This is my mum & BlackBerry

When I look back at my childhood, there was always something to do and always a family member who I could do it with. You know what I’m talking about, the times when you could play cards with your brother or create a dance routine with your sister. But when you look at the youth of today, times have definitely changed, as the only thing spending time with them are their BlackBerries, PS3’s or TV.

I try my best to make ample time for my daughter, as I would never want her to grow up thinking that I wasn’t there for her and didn’t appreciate her being but there are many parents who are happy to let their children be absorbed by their gadgets, which has become much more readily available than they were in my time.

My daughter who treats her BlackBerry like a third hand, is still happy to spend quality time with me and especially enjoys visiting my Gran, which is much more than I can say for many young people. But when she has been punished and her BlackBerry has to be added to my collection of phones, she always looks as though the world has ended because in her eyes, she can no longer communicate with the outside world. How tragic!

Speaking to a friend of mine, she had said that her mother used to shower her with gifts and send her to plenty of after-school activities, as she felt that this was a way of showing her daughter she loved her without having to spend quality time with her. Now I know everyone may not be blessed with maternal instincts but with methods like this, is there any wonder why some children are no longer team players in regard to family activities and only make an appearance at special occasions?

Family values are not held as high in esteem as they used to be and it’s a shame as you never know how our young people may have turned out. Long gone are the days when families used to huddle around one TV to enjoy some family entertainment together, as many young people already have a TV in their room, which in many cases is already  equipped with Freeview or Sky+. Oh how the times have changed!

What disappoints me is that young people literally get all the latest technological goods available and therefore sometimes fall into the trap of not having to work for anything. The uproar that came recently when the EMA was next on the list to be skipped showed me two things. Number 1, that there were many underprivileged families who were going to be affected by the cut and number 2, there were young people who didn’t think about the possibility of obtaining part-time work. I personally started working from a young age and knowing that I was able to buy my own things with my hard-earned money, meant that I appreciated my things even more and didn’t take them for granted.

Listening to BBC London, Vanessa Feltz had mentioned the average age that young people starting to do things of an adult nature. For example, the average age of a child drinking is 16, whilst smoking held a disappointing age of 10. The average age for wearing make-up was 13, which also was the same for wearing heels. And let me tell you, they weren’t talking about kitten heels either!

This generation are growing ahead of their time and moving in the wrong direction, as instead of picking up necessary life skills along the way, will mean that they will be in for an almighty shock in their first taster of adulthood. From cooking to budgeting, I have come across many young people who can’t even boil an egg and don’t take pride in their belongings unless it is plastered with a designer label.

I remember the days when kids would wash cars to earn money but now, as pocket money is handed to them on a plate, why would they feel the need to earn it? I for one feel no way to take away pocket money if you haven’t been as well-behaved as expected. My daughter has become accustomed to waking up and doing her chores, as she knows she doesn’t want to hear my voice AGAIN!

I worry for the next generation, as they will be the ones being brought up by our present young people.  With TV shows like Bank of Mum and Dad showcasing how disadvantaged many people in their late teens to mid-20s have become in terms of not being able to spend wisely or not having the necessary skills to even boil pasta, God help them when they become parents.

So as you watch your son or daughter continue with their bb messenger marathons, ask yourself these three things: –

1. Have they learnt to appreciate and value the things they have been given?
2. Have they learnt any life skills which will prepare them for the real world?
3. And finally, if you were to pass away tomorrow, would they be able to continue an organised, productive life without you? Or would they have to turn to another adult role model for guidance?

 

Life is too short and our kids are continuing to behave as though they are grown without knowing what hurdles come with adulthood. Cherish the glorious times with them and encourage them to enjoy their childhood but also prepare them by taking small steps.

Remember, “Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once”.
– Lillian Dickson